i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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