hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize
