all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Randomize
