Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Randomize
