Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
