I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
Randomize
