matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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