So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
