hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
