After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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