I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Randomize
