I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
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