is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize