sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Randomize
