dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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