I want to stick my p in your. b.
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
