do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
