well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
