So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Randomize
