idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Randomize
