o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
