i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
me + whiskey = a bad person
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
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