Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize
