I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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