I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
