"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
organizing the empties. That sober.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize