quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
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