that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
