um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Don't tell me you're on acid again
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
