I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
My vagina is very pro this idea
Randomize
