i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Randomize
