I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Randomize
