brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
Randomize
