I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
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