I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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