Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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