i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize
