just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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