dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Randomize
