youre lurking in front of me
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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