I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
im having a threesome with these popsicles
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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