remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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