What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Randomize
