He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
