Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize
