i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
