This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Randomize
