i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
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