I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Randomize
