margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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