3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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